By Pumpkin - 29 Mar 17 7:56 AM
Hey everyone I hope you're all doing well.
Unfortunately I've found that after a conviction or some sort of big mistake the people around me have either cut me off from all contact or treated me very unkindly. In some instances, such as work, I found that they couldn't cut me out immediately as they may have wanted to and so made it a very uncomfortable work environment to push me out.
I'd be interested to hear if any of you have had any similar experiences and what helped you get through this?
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By link - 29 Mar 17 11:07 PM
Hi Pumpkin,
I had similar circumstances, I was caught quite unaware as I hadn't even been arrested when my previous employer had become aware through an "acquaintance" of an investigation and spared no time in making sure I was gone no questions asked. I had hoped for some discretion but pretty much overnight my facebook friends dwindled, at that point I knew I was "out" so shut down my social media and went into hiding.
Fast forward many years and I live elsewhere, different job, different home, but a not so different life in many respects. I would say having lost one life (friends, family etc.) I am a lot like a ghost, I am very recluse and sheltered and isolated and keep people at arms length. On a day to day basis I put up a front, a fake smile or a mask which helps me survive although deep inside I'm probably the most depressed person around. How do I cope? Well I have some hobbies, my work and further education which helps me numb out the pain, some days are better than others, I would categorise a bad day when my thoughts towards those who ghosted me as "f*ck them", they were never my friends to begin with, and on better days as "it's their loss".
I am the white elephant in the room, but I've painted myself grey to blend in...
I would like to think I am a very understanding person, I've been through my fair share of sh"t in life that one day I hope I'll meet someone who I can truly reflect with and connect, I guess that's to say I'm pretty optimistic for a pessimist. My advice is to find yourself, what makes you happy and drives you and focus on that, other people don't bring you happiness it comes from within and yes life can be lonely but even when I had hundreds of friends and a life time of locality to fall back on I still felt alone.
Cherish the small things, the past is behind you for a reason.
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