+xHi All
I've recently had a bit of a dilemma that I'd like to share. I'm not really looking for an answer but I'd be interested in hearing what you'd do if you came across the following scenario.
I have a criminal record and for the last 8 years I've worked for an organisation which supports ex-offenders. Everyday I spread the message that people can and do change and I feel passionately that we shouldn't continue to criminalise people for the least little thing.
However, last week my beliefs were really challenged and it came as a complete shock to me - I became a victim of crime.
That sounds a bit more dramatic than what it was. In a completely unprovoked attack a young lad in his early 20's on a pushbike came up to my car at a set of traffic lights and kicked my wing mirror off, threw his bike against the drivers window and then started kicking the drivers door. I'm not sure whether he'd mistook my car for somebody else's but the result was approximately £350 worth of damage. It happened right next to the entrance of a pub car park which had a camera pointing at the road so it's possible that there would be a record of the incident and the guy in the car behind me gave me his contact details and told me he'd witnessed what had happened.
So to my dilemma - for the first time in ages I felt really vulnerable and my gut instinct was to contact the police, however as I drove home I knew that this went against everything that I believed in. I've not reported the incident but instead have had to listen to friends and family tell me that I should and I'm mad if I don't!!! It's more than likely that if I did report it the police wouldn't take it any further but if they did potentially this young lad could be charged with criminal damage.
Seeing as everybody on this forum has been affected by a criminal record, what would you have done? Really interested in your thoughts.
F
Hi
I emphasis with the emotional stress put on you by being a victim but also as an ex-offender and please bear with me why I offer my thoughts. I am an ex-offender and I am struggling to change the view of the majority of society that "anyone" can offend but they can also learn from that to become what we term as "rehabilitated".
First the actual details of the offence only matter if you report it - an action I would recommend. See the end for actions I would do.
We would agree the percentage chances of you finding and therefore talking to this individual are not reasonably in your favour, so you cannot explain the consequences of offending e.g. the circle of their victims grows and encompasses more people than they may think. Therefore and as we all know, you will not have the chance to offer your words directly if the authorities are involved. If however by writing a positive - non condemning - impact statement to the Judge, the outcome may be surprising.
In my view your considerations should be more concerned with understanding your own emotional long term damage!
As you mention, you feel inclined that you must in some way help the individual's future i.e. not getting a criminal record, which is understandable due to the emotional effects on you by your past. The question to ask yourself "is this just your quilt making this option more prominent and favourable?" Only you can answer that if you are to be honest with yourself as your words do not suggest your motive is revenge.
Your words suggest you understand the impact of any offence on the "wide circle of victims" created, the impacts may be long term and not recognisable at first but they will be there. We all know each one of us ex-offenders at some time feel aggravated, frustrated and selfish by comparing our fate to what we perceive as "the luck of the draw of others". I know I do. That moment could be the time your decision will reappear in either in its ugly or pleasant nature. By this I mean, whatever your decision, at some time in the future when your past affects you, you need to not view this decision as ugly and so regrettable.
Whatever your decision, I hope at some time in the future you will still be happy with it.
Evidence gathering ideas:
The video evidence is there - for how long is questionable so you must contact the pub and other buildings ASAP before they delete it. You have factual evidence from the driver of the other car, get them to write it down ASAP before any details could be questionable due to memory loss / time. In this time of under resourcing you having this will strengthen your case.