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Really struggling at the minute....


Really struggling at the minute....

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Dave Lister
Dave Lister
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So, where do I begin? Nearly 19 months into a 36 month community sentence and I'm still getting verbal abuse from a neighbour for my conviction. I'm trying my best to stay positive but this guy is just like a mood-hoover. The papers did a hatchet-job, they take glee from it. It's not helping with my suicidal thoughts I keep on having. My predicament is self-inflicted of course.

Tips for staying sane?

Thanks

DL
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Dave Lister - 12 Jul 17 9:11 PM
So, where do I begin? Nearly 19 months into a 36 month community sentence and I'm still getting verbal abuse from a neighbour for my conviction. I'm trying my best to stay positive but this guy is just like a mood-hoover. The papers did a hatchet-job, they take glee from it. It's not helping with my suicidal thoughts I keep on having. My predicament is self-inflicted of course.

Tips for staying sane?

Thanks

DL

Well, it would be flippant to say that if you don't like this neighbour, get a different one. If moving is an option, then it could be worth exploring. If not, then Kipling's poem about keeping your head when all around are losing theirs might be helpful. Any abuse you get says more about the abuser than the abused. Not much you can do about the papers for now, but Unlock has advice on dealing with that sort of thing on the website here, so that might be helpful. It may well be true that your criminal record is self-inflicted, but the rest isn't. It might be worth keeping a diary about your neighbour, as harassment is a criminal offence, and the fact that you have a criminal record is not a defence, and certainly not an open invitation for anyone else to join in. If you're having that sort of thought, then it may sound drastic, but that is one of the things that the Samaritans can help with. It's now free to call them, and they're open 24/7. The phone number is 116 123. If you're having that sort of thought, then they want to hear from you.

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As Chris Stacey said: Although its not formally part of the sentence that is handed down in court, the criminal record that someone comes away with effectively becomes a second sentence, which can have a long-lasting, if not lifelong, impact.

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Dave Lister - 12 Jul 17 9:11 PM
So, where do I begin? Nearly 19 months into a 36 month community sentence and I'm still getting verbal abuse from a neighbour for my conviction. I'm trying my best to stay positive but this guy is just like a mood-hoover. The papers did a hatchet-job, they take glee from it. It's not helping with my suicidal thoughts I keep on having. My predicament is self-inflicted of course.

Tips for staying sane?

Thanks

DL

Reminds me of a previous time in my life... The verbal abuse, the wild accusations, the eggs at the front door, bricks at the windows and the attempted break in's to no doubt "do me over", and this was a respectable place to live but it's amazing how people turn a blind eye when they feel like it! 

It's amazing how irrational some people become, from there own perspective they just don't want you in there bubble or should I say they would rather live in the knowledge of not knowing. Don't take it personally just keep your head down and your spirit up... Moving for me was the best thing I did to feel "safe" physically and emotionally, it wasn't financially the easiest solution as I had to rent my old house out for several years before I was in a position to sell up. 

In terms of staying sane suicide is just letting them win and why give them the benefit, as said keep a diary of events and report them for harassment etc. The papers and the Internet are there to spread fear and make money nothing more, ignore it as there's nothing you can do about it now so your only beating yourself up about it.

Start thinking long term, I know at the moment everything might be a day by day basis but consider where do you want to be in five or ten years time? What job might you enjoy doing? Where do you want to call home?
GO


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