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james1979
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Group: Forum Members
Posts: 5,
Visits: 82
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+x+x+xHi, I think the varied feedback that is offered here is always welcome and so do not take my words as anything but a consideration for those reading this topic and find themselves lost and/or alone. It is important we must remember that every individual's "journey" is different according to how they present themselves and therefore how they are percieved by others. The following words are written with the acknowledgement that certain individuals within the "Justice System" have their own agenda and so possibly influenced by thoughts outside of that environment. Just remember you have no control over that "environment" and so you can only attempt to influence / change their agenda by " your behavior"; especially towards them! Often we forget that no matter the "truth" behind the events that created the need for us to be monitored, "WE" are in scenarios that require actions to instill in us that we need to "gain control of certain aspects of our lives!" therefore we are facing the consequences for our actions!. Note I appreciate that in some cases injustices do occur, but I feel the principle of my words are still appropriate. Remember when we made a mistake as a child, I would suggest most figures who had some form of responsibility for us (parents, teachers) would punish us until we behaved properly. As a child we would think "life is not fair" when punished, but that was because of our "immaturity" and couldn't understand " our actions have consequences!" Eventually and hopefully, we would be rewarded for our "good behavior" and we had learned a valuable lesson; again hopefully. If we consider my words above and transfer that to the "Justice System's" approach, then hopefully we can see a similarity and possibly assist in our learning to "retake control of our emotions" and so reduce stress and improve our quality of life; that is our aim surely. To achieve our aim; as shown by successful individuals, we have to be flexible in our attitude and so adjust to the different and possibly conflicting, scenarios we face. Our inner strength will only develop by understanding the full consequences of the scenario so we can adjust to it; or challenge it calmly using the "facts and evidence" we have discovered to support any response made. Note "emotional energy" wasted stressing about things you do not fully understand is better used researching. This action will surprising improve your "wellbeing"; even if the research does not provide the result you wish for. Why? Quite simply because you know the facts and so can control your own "environment", which will help in how you interface with those creating the scenario you find yourself in! Obviously you will see the above referring towards the Justice System but you could also use it towards "societal" scenarios. Just remember that most of "society" do not fully understand anything: about your offence, about SO's, the punishments involved or believe in the fact that rehabilitation is a reality; as many choose the acceptance of it is impossible. Smile at the irony that if we denied "facts" presented to us, we would be told we are in denial and suffer further consequences for our actions/belief!. Though I could write more I would ask that no matter "your scenario": only focus on what you can control and know to be true, research to understand the actual facts and always present them or respond to your "monitor" calmly and respectfully; even when questioning (not challenging) actions by others towards you. Recognise that acting in a "mature manner" will always bring "mature responses". Spot on and I myself have done exactly what you have said, controlled my own environment and what I can controll. I broke it down into 3 things for me as I was going through everything, number 1 was let through police do what they need to and accept what they do and don't rise to baits by them and keep emotions in check, honestly it's been so much easier. Number 2, get on the housing list and get a home, this has been achieved or will be next year, number 3 get a job or volunteering position, 1 I have achieved as been volunteering for nearly a year and the job..well I will get there at some point but thanks for the reply, everything else k can't controll (society, employers etc) so I don't stress about it. Hi James1979, Well done is the most positive reply to the positive way you are developing and controlling your "Wellbeing". Volunteering: to those who are not successful in gaining opportunities this way please do not stress. I did not achieve any role of this nature or gain paid employment, but I still gained agreement for my SOPO to dismissed; in fact the Judge said he would of dismissed my SOR requirement if I had applied. I simply explained that "employment" should not be seen as only for "finanical reward" and, that disclosure in some volunteering scenarios can result in less than positive responses due to lack of "data protection" in small working / living environments. I helped out at a local camper van conversion business offering support with: business advice, sweeping up, making tea and bacon cobs. In return I was able to build my own campervan which does lead to interesting conversations with my PPU but that is another story. I say the above as encouragement and to show volunteer work is not just in a charity shop; Just remember to monitor your wellbeing and have self belief in yourself Can I ask how long you waited from conviction to get shpo dismissed? Is it like 5-6 years?
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JASB
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Group: Awaiting Activation
Posts: 1.1K,
Visits: 1.7K
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+x+xHi, I think the varied feedback that is offered here is always welcome and so do not take my words as anything but a consideration for those reading this topic and find themselves lost and/or alone. It is important we must remember that every individual's "journey" is different according to how they present themselves and therefore how they are percieved by others. The following words are written with the acknowledgement that certain individuals within the "Justice System" have their own agenda and so possibly influenced by thoughts outside of that environment. Just remember you have no control over that "environment" and so you can only attempt to influence / change their agenda by " your behavior"; especially towards them! Often we forget that no matter the "truth" behind the events that created the need for us to be monitored, "WE" are in scenarios that require actions to instill in us that we need to "gain control of certain aspects of our lives!" therefore we are facing the consequences for our actions!. Note I appreciate that in some cases injustices do occur, but I feel the principle of my words are still appropriate. Remember when we made a mistake as a child, I would suggest most figures who had some form of responsibility for us (parents, teachers) would punish us until we behaved properly. As a child we would think "life is not fair" when punished, but that was because of our "immaturity" and couldn't understand " our actions have consequences!" Eventually and hopefully, we would be rewarded for our "good behavior" and we had learned a valuable lesson; again hopefully. If we consider my words above and transfer that to the "Justice System's" approach, then hopefully we can see a similarity and possibly assist in our learning to "retake control of our emotions" and so reduce stress and improve our quality of life; that is our aim surely. To achieve our aim; as shown by successful individuals, we have to be flexible in our attitude and so adjust to the different and possibly conflicting, scenarios we face. Our inner strength will only develop by understanding the full consequences of the scenario so we can adjust to it; or challenge it calmly using the "facts and evidence" we have discovered to support any response made. Note "emotional energy" wasted stressing about things you do not fully understand is better used researching. This action will surprising improve your "wellbeing"; even if the research does not provide the result you wish for. Why? Quite simply because you know the facts and so can control your own "environment", which will help in how you interface with those creating the scenario you find yourself in! Obviously you will see the above referring towards the Justice System but you could also use it towards "societal" scenarios. Just remember that most of "society" do not fully understand anything: about your offence, about SO's, the punishments involved or believe in the fact that rehabilitation is a reality; as many choose the acceptance of it is impossible. Smile at the irony that if we denied "facts" presented to us, we would be told we are in denial and suffer further consequences for our actions/belief!. Though I could write more I would ask that no matter "your scenario": only focus on what you can control and know to be true, research to understand the actual facts and always present them or respond to your "monitor" calmly and respectfully; even when questioning (not challenging) actions by others towards you. Recognise that acting in a "mature manner" will always bring "mature responses". Spot on and I myself have done exactly what you have said, controlled my own environment and what I can controll. I broke it down into 3 things for me as I was going through everything, number 1 was let through police do what they need to and accept what they do and don't rise to baits by them and keep emotions in check, honestly it's been so much easier. Number 2, get on the housing list and get a home, this has been achieved or will be next year, number 3 get a job or volunteering position, 1 I have achieved as been volunteering for nearly a year and the job..well I will get there at some point but thanks for the reply, everything else k can't controll (society, employers etc) so I don't stress about it. Hi James1979, Well done is the most positive reply to the positive way you are developing and controlling your "Wellbeing". Volunteering: to those who are not successful in gaining opportunities this way please do not stress. I did not achieve any role of this nature or gain paid employment, but I still gained agreement for my SOPO to dismissed; in fact the Judge said he would of dismissed my SOR requirement if I had applied. I simply explained that "employment" should not be seen as only for "finanical reward" and, that disclosure in some volunteering scenarios can result in less than positive responses due to lack of "data protection" in small working / living environments. I helped out at a local camper van conversion business offering support with: business advice, sweeping up, making tea and bacon cobs. In return I was able to build my own campervan which does lead to interesting conversations with my PPU but that is another story. I say the above as encouragement and to show volunteer work is not just in a charity shop; Just remember to monitor your wellbeing and have self belief in yourself
Society suggests I must let go of all my expectations but I disagree, as whilst I have a voice, I have hope.
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope is for tomorrow else what is left if you remove a mans hope.
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This forum supports these words, thank you Unlock and your contributors.
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james1979
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Group: Forum Members
Posts: 5,
Visits: 82
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+xHi, I think the varied feedback that is offered here is always welcome and so do not take my words as anything but a consideration for those reading this topic and find themselves lost and/or alone. It is important we must remember that every individual's "journey" is different according to how they present themselves and therefore how they are percieved by others. The following words are written with the acknowledgement that certain individuals within the "Justice System" have their own agenda and so possibly influenced by thoughts outside of that environment. Just remember you have no control over that "environment" and so you can only attempt to influence / change their agenda by " your behavior"; especially towards them! Often we forget that no matter the "truth" behind the events that created the need for us to be monitored, "WE" are in scenarios that require actions to instill in us that we need to "gain control of certain aspects of our lives!" therefore we are facing the consequences for our actions!. Note I appreciate that in some cases injustices do occur, but I feel the principle of my words are still appropriate. Remember when we made a mistake as a child, I would suggest most figures who had some form of responsibility for us (parents, teachers) would punish us until we behaved properly. As a child we would think "life is not fair" when punished, but that was because of our "immaturity" and couldn't understand " our actions have consequences!" Eventually and hopefully, we would be rewarded for our "good behavior" and we had learned a valuable lesson; again hopefully. If we consider my words above and transfer that to the "Justice System's" approach, then hopefully we can see a similarity and possibly assist in our learning to "retake control of our emotions" and so reduce stress and improve our quality of life; that is our aim surely. To achieve our aim; as shown by successful individuals, we have to be flexible in our attitude and so adjust to the different and possibly conflicting, scenarios we face. Our inner strength will only develop by understanding the full consequences of the scenario so we can adjust to it; or challenge it calmly using the "facts and evidence" we have discovered to support any response made. Note "emotional energy" wasted stressing about things you do not fully understand is better used researching. This action will surprising improve your "wellbeing"; even if the research does not provide the result you wish for. Why? Quite simply because you know the facts and so can control your own "environment", which will help in how you interface with those creating the scenario you find yourself in! Obviously you will see the above referring towards the Justice System but you could also use it towards "societal" scenarios. Just remember that most of "society" do not fully understand anything: about your offence, about SO's, the punishments involved or believe in the fact that rehabilitation is a reality; as many choose the acceptance of it is impossible. Smile at the irony that if we denied "facts" presented to us, we would be told we are in denial and suffer further consequences for our actions/belief!. Though I could write more I would ask that no matter "your scenario": only focus on what you can control and know to be true, research to understand the actual facts and always present them or respond to your "monitor" calmly and respectfully; even when questioning (not challenging) actions by others towards you. Recognise that acting in a "mature manner" will always bring "mature responses". Spot on and I myself have done exactly what you have said, controlled my own environment and what I can controll. I broke it down into 3 things for me as I was going through everything, number 1 was let through police do what they need to and accept what they do and don't rise to baits by them and keep emotions in check, honestly it's been so much easier. Number 2, get on the housing list and get a home, this has been achieved or will be next year, number 3 get a job or volunteering position, 1 I have achieved as been volunteering for nearly a year and the job..well I will get there at some point but thanks for the reply, everything else k can't controll (society, employers etc) so I don't stress about it.
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JASB
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Group: Awaiting Activation
Posts: 1.1K,
Visits: 1.7K
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Hi, I think the varied feedback that is offered here is always welcome and so do not take my words as anything but a consideration for those reading this topic and find themselves lost and/or alone.
It is important we must remember that every individual's "journey" is different according to how they present themselves and therefore how they are percieved by others. The following words are written with the acknowledgement that certain individuals within the "Justice System" have their own agenda and so possibly influenced by thoughts outside of that environment. Just remember you have no control over that "environment" and so you can only attempt to influence / change their agenda by "your behavior"; especially towards them!
Often we forget that no matter the "truth" behind the events that created the need for us to be monitored, "WE" are in scenarios that require actions to instill in us that we need to "gain control of certain aspects of our lives!" therefore we are facing the consequences for our actions!. Note I appreciate that in some cases injustices do occur, but I feel the principle of my words are still appropriate.
Remember when we made a mistake as a child, I would suggest most figures who had some form of responsibility for us (parents, teachers) would punish us until we behaved properly. As a child we would think "life is not fair" when punished, but that was because of our "immaturity" and couldn't understand "our actions have consequences!" Eventually and hopefully, we would be rewarded for our "good behavior" and we had learned a valuable lesson; again hopefully.
If we consider my words above and transfer that to the "Justice System's" approach, then hopefully we can see a similarity and possibly assist in our learning to "retake control of our emotions" and so reduce stress and improve our quality of life; that is our aim surely.
To achieve our aim; as shown by successful individuals, we have to be flexible in our attitude and so adjust to the different and possibly conflicting, scenarios we face. Our inner strength will only develop by understanding the full consequences of the scenario so we can adjust to it; or challenge it calmly using the "facts and evidence" we have discovered to support any response made. Note "emotional energy" wasted stressing about things you do not fully understand is better used researching. This action will surprising improve your "wellbeing"; even if the research does not provide the result you wish for. Why? Quite simply because you know the facts and so can control your own "environment", which will help in how you interface with those creating the scenario you find yourself in!
Obviously you will see the above referring towards the Justice System but you could also use it towards "societal" scenarios. Just remember that most of "society" do not fully understand anything: about your offence, about SO's, the punishments involved or believe in the fact that rehabilitation is a reality; as many choose the acceptance of it is impossible. Smile at the irony that if we denied "facts" presented to us, we would be told we are in denial and suffer further consequences for our actions/belief!.
Though I could write more I would ask that no matter "your scenario": only focus on what you can control and know to be true, research to understand the actual facts and always present them or respond to your "monitor" calmly and respectfully; even when questioning (not challenging) actions by others towards you.
Recognise that acting in a "mature manner" will always bring "mature responses".
Society suggests I must let go of all my expectations but I disagree, as whilst I have a voice, I have hope.
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope is for tomorrow else what is left if you remove a mans hope.
------------------------------
This forum supports these words, thank you Unlock and your contributors.
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james1979
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Group: Forum Members
Posts: 5,
Visits: 82
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Hi all,
I posted 2 maybe 3 years back, I have a conviction for indecent images and made Subject to 10 year shpo amd sign the register for 10 years, its been a while so I wanted to update you all and give some tips and what I have learned and challange you all if you are looking for work, so onwards.
First off the police interaction, has been fine but I barely see or hear from them, the last time I saw them was 6 months back after a year and half wait and they put some monitoring software on the phone and pc.. didn't ask why they suddenly decided to do that as I am.not bothered as have nowt to hide which leads into my first tip.. the police are not your friends and will never go to bat or vouch for you and they can pretty much do what they want when it comes into managing the orders against you so let them do what they need to do but don't be afraid in asking questions, your ppu officer should ait down with you and ask questions anyway, just answer honestly and don't lie as there is no point in lying at the ppu stage, if you have a problem then do tell them so they can help, if your ppu refuses to engage with you then put a complaint in, unlock helpline can advise on that, yes there first priority is to keep the public safe but as my ppu said they are there to.help get you through these orders and do want you succeed, so keep a good relationship with them.
Housing... now this is going to be hard but keep pushing and be prepared to fight to get a proper response as if its a recent conviction they will.refuse you outright due to it being recent and then tell you to reapply in x number of yours, now I went back and challenged this which was somewhat successful and my wait was reduced to 2 years with next march being the end of that wait and me going on the housing list as long as I.dont get arrested or break.those orders, so come march I can apply for housing, so be consistent and challange every ruling and ask them to expand on any decisions, don't be afraid to challange as they don't expect it and if persistent it will work.
Jobs... this is a hurdle I am working and its really really hard, expect knockbacks and to be ignored once you disclose, remember ask any work agency what there process is for people with convictions andnif they say "depends what it is" that's as good as an answer of "we don't consider people with convictions" don't waste your time with these employers, thank them for there time and move on, can't tell the forum the number of times an agency has asked me to disclose and then completely ghosted me and refuse to take my calls, so be careful and only disclose if asked and lime.i said if they um and erm or say depends what it is...move on. Since i last went on this forum I got a really good volunteering gig with a charity dealing with adults with disadvantages, its a reception/admin job and I am really good at it and it gets me out-of the house 3 days a week now and I recently applied for and got an interview at the place where I volunteer and came really close, so anything is possible despite my huge barriers I won't give up. So here's what I learned in regards to job hunting, if you see something you like apply for it, at the end of the day they can only say no at worst case scenario, obviously.when it comes to.jobs be realistic as.in.the bounds of the shpo and register but at least apply, you will be surprised how.far you get. Also to further help you out look for the ban the box employer document, its over 100 pages long and counting, its a good starting point and will help you, just be prepared to work at it and just apply, resilience is key and start building up.
So my challange is for anyone who's stuck, apply for something, a course, a volunteering position or even a job and see what happens, for volunteering just Google volunteering opportunities and then your nearest town. I am.not claiming to have all the answers or everything figured as I am struggling to land work but if I can land an interview and get seriously.considred with all.my disadvantages then I know you as well. If anyone has anything to.add or.more tips, please add to this post and good luck.
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